Nope, never mind. I can’t blarg about this. It’s too gross even for me. There’s nothing funny about violating the butthole of a two-year-old with a tiny plastic tube.
Okay, on second thought, maybe there is. Just not perhaps the kind of funny you want.
But there’s definitely nothing funny about the boy walking around with a look on his face like he’s just been told that Popsicles are made out of horses as he squeezes off tiny little duck-quack farts with every step.
…Again, perhaps it’s not the right kind of funny.
Look, there was definitely a scene. There were towels on the floor and a lot of screaming. There was talk of breaking out the puppy housebreaking pads. I can’t remember if it was the boy screaming or my wife or myself, but it was high-pitched and plaintive. I was really concerned about the state of the tub at one point. There may or may not have been comparisons to Georgia red clay and mud-hut bricks.
But it was too gross to write about, so this is me not writing about it.
Day two of editing is underway. Like jumping into a freezing cold pool, it’s not so bad once you actually get in the water. More to come later.
It’s hard to focus with all this poop I’m not writing about.
Accidentally Inspired 
September 15th, 2014 at 9:33 PM
[…] hundred percent lodged in the kid’s business, and that’s literal as well as figurative (see this post which is not about giving enemas to a toddler). Partly because frankly my wife and I need a little bit of backup every now and then and the […]
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November 21st, 2014 at 11:50 PM
[…] fact: one of the most viewed, and the most-searched topics that lands new people at the blarg, is this post about giving my son an enema. Which goes to show, I guess, that my novel needs more poop […]
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December 10th, 2014 at 11:44 PM
[…] start off very clear. The post that gathers all this traffic is this one, in which I talked about how I wasn’t going to talk about the time I gave my son an enema, […]
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September 26th, 2016 at 7:37 AM
[…] been a constant head-scratcher ever since I penned it, but the story I didn’t write about giving my son an enema never seems to leave the top […]
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