Something happened to me today, and I’m concerned. Partially about the world I live in, partially about the person who did it to me and partially about the whole of reality.

This is not facetiary. (If that’s not a word, it should be. Facetiousness? Get right out of town.) Either somebody I love dearly is losing their mind or the universe I thought I lived in has been swapped out for one where up is down.

So I put it to you, denizens of the internet.

Is jello with mayonnaise a thing?

Because if it is, then first of all, GROSS, and second of all, I don’t think I can live on this planet anymore.

And if it’s not, I have some very difficult decisions to make about my loved one.