Best of 2019

Best of

It’s been a year of growth around here at ACCIDENTALLY INSPIRED.

It seems like barely twelve months ago subscriber numbers were hovering around the 500 mark. Now inching closer to the 3000 milestone, word is finally spreading about what some of us veteran readers have known for a long time – Matt’s beastly fine little corner of the blogosphere is the place to come for swashbuckling great reads, supreme writerly insights and thrillifying analogies and turns of phrase.

Here’s a sweet sixteen collection of his finest posts from the year –

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# 1. Wordsmithery and Feelings of Inadequacy (July 19)

Pav’s sister said something to him many years ago that lit up his brain like a candelabra. It stuck. It grew. It played on loop. It shaped him. What did she say? You’ll need to read this acclaim-worthy post to find out.
Remember it HERE.

# 2. A Spring Thaw (February 12)

Is he a kindergartner refusing to eat his vegetables? Is he an adult wracked with doubt after reading one too many writing advice books? Either way its tools down for our budding pro-author while his path up Novel Mountain is temporarily halted by the feeling maybe he’s not doing it right. Holed up at base camp with his tent flap bared open for all to see, our momentarily oxygen-deprived story explorer confesses, in a moment of delirium, it may actually be comforting not trying to write every day. We don’t believe him. We know it’s not true. Fool us you don’t! Wrestling with your inner critic you may well be. Yet we know all the while you’re busy fitting steel crampons to your hiking boots and reaching for that trusty ice-axe. The next stage of the climb awaits…

This simply brilliant post includes what surely must be a strong contender for ‘Analogy of the Year’“I feel better when I write. It cleans out the mental pathways like running a Neti-Pot through your sinuses”.
Remember it HERE.

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# 3. The Dawdle (July 8)

Pav treats us to an original short story about an author who puts effort – a lot of effort – maybe too much effort – into setting up the perfect writing conditions. This includes having on-hand a 78 hour long, personally curated playlist of songs. Guaranteed to bring a knowing smile of recognition to every writer and would-be writer’s face.
Remember it HERE.

# 4. On Writing Advice (August 10)

For those who’ve ever been tempted to flip the middle finger at writing advice from successful, published authors and regard rules as something made merely to be broken, this thought-piece will provide pause. In a post-truth world where regard for authority and expertise is not as it once was, Pav wisely recommends the path of “assimilating a little bit of knowledge from the people who have gone before you along the way.” He analogizes about the perils of people deciding to throw the road rules out the window and drive on the left hand side of the road. In my region of the Planet, sorry to be the one to tell you Pav, that’s completely normal. Yet I know what you mean!
Remember it HERE.

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# 5. That’s A Wrap – Kind Of (September 21st)

Always one to consider the feelings and wishes of his loyal readers, Pav explains the reason he’s been feeding us all mere breadcrumbs on the blog of late (posting less) is that he’s been devoting all that writing energy to a higher cause – namely putting the finishing touches on his novel masterwork. Ok, sounds like a reasonable excuse. You’re forgiven – for now! There are greater crimes, I suppose, than moonlighting from your own ‘blarg’.
Remember it HERE.

# 6. Story-Matic #46 (October 17)

Nothing interesting happens in libraries? Wrong! This little short story gem from our master writer features librarian Alise, homeless Gary, and a stoop. Not only that… you also get a twenty year mystery about an unpublished novel that turns up in someone’s backpack. Breath in the musty air of this veritable mind-boggling boulevard.
Remember it HERE.

# 7. Anti-Social Socialites (June 15th)

The next sentence is true. The previous statement was false. But for a real paradox read this post. Pav deems the act of writing to be a type of self-imposed solitary confinement. Yet, as he points out, writers have to know, and know intimately, how people think and act. And in order to do that they have to get out amongst real people and mix with them. Hence the very apt title of the post.
Remember it HERE.

# 8. The Hideout Needs a Name (July 31)

What’s this? A sample passage from his novel-in-progress dangled unannounced for we readers to pour over like cheese morsel thrown to hungry mice? Well… yes it is! Features a character called Dina who opens a bag of tortilla chips by ‘gashing’ it with her ring.
Remember it HERE.

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# 9. The Pill Problem, Revisited (April 25)

The reasoning goes like this: when you have a headache you take a Tylenol. You then have a lie down and the pain goes away. Logically after the pain has gone you don’t keep on taking the Tylenol. All on solid footing so far, right? And yet… he’s getting the skeptical eyes from his wife, which, as he puts it, “is usually a sign that I need to pump the brakes.” Should he take his thumb off the scales or leave it on? Are these bathroom scales or kitchen scales? And will he opt for name brand or generic? The answers to all these questions and more are contained in this fascinating and as usual, brutally self-honest post.
Remember it HERE.

# 10. Early-Man Ennui (June 24)

Two caveman, Dag and Thop (both with British accents) contemplate the very possibly ‘spiritually icky’ meaning of life. Hunger takes over and their stone-age navel-gazing comes to an end. They go out and hunt for antelope.The whole shebang is downright pre-hysterical if you ask me!
Remember it HERE.

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# 11. Story-Matic #63 (October 20)

Two body builders in a gym. In the right light, both with enough popping veins to make them look like human road maps. One’s named Dimitri. The other is Kurtis. Kurtis decides to play a trick on his buddy Dimitri. The trick involves superimposing a certain image over the weights on each end of a barbell Dimitri is lifting in a video. It’s kooky. It’s funny. This fiction piece has ‘Personal Best’ written all over it.
Remember it HERE.

# 12. The Theory of A-Holes (October 15)

We’ve all traveled that rough stretch of human highway; the one populated with inconsiderate, self-centered mooks who irritate like sandpaper. Its part of what it means to be human, no matter what part of the world you live in. Pav puts forward an anthropological theory to try to account for why there seem to be more annoying nitwits around these days than ever before. His thesis references big fish, small ponds, the film A BUG’S LIFE and toilet paper. Searching for profound meaning? The Dalai Lama has nothing on this.
Remember it HERE.

# 13. The Inevitable Pain of Football Season (August 31st)

As a writer, Pav and pain have naturally been companions for some many years. His life as a teacher has no doubt also brought him face to face with a variety of… ahem, for want of a better word… pains. Yet it is the highs and lows of footy season fandom that occupy his thoughts on this occasion.
Remember it HERE.

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# 14. A Superpower You Didn’t Know You Had (July 4th)

Episodes of The Handmaid’s Tale have Matt questioning “Who’s driving the bus?” Who indeed. The answers are bona-fide bristling and certainly worth the re-read.
Remember it HERE.

# 15. A Quick Monologue (August 24)

He feels the need to spell out to his readers that this bit of spice is ENTIRELY fictional. Read it and you’ll see why.
Remember it HERE.

# 16. Signs, Signs Everywhere (February 23)

When does a restroom sign look like a dude putting a baby on a grill? When it looks like this….
Remember it HERE.

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About Glen Available

101 things you need to know about Glen Donaldson. Probably. Allright, possibly. His favourite movies: - The Taking of Pelham 1 2 3 (1974 version) - The Fountainhead (1949) - The Pledge (2001) - Alone in Berlin (2017) - The Lovely Bones (2009) - Which Way to the Front? (1970) - The Woodsman (2004) - The Circle (2017) - Insomnia (2002) - Harry in your Pocket (1973) - The Admiral Crichton (1957) - Breaking Away (1979) - Get Out (2017) - Hang 'Em High (1968) - Deathtrap (1982) - Unlawful Entry (1992) - Houseboat (1958) - Holocaust 2000 (1977) - Training Day (2001) - One Hour Photo ((2002) - The Rain People (1969) - United 93 (2006) - The Wooden Horse (1950) - Beverly Hills Ninja (1997) - A Cure for Wellness (2017) - The Silent Partner (1978) - Victor Frankenstein (2015) - Capricorn One (1978) - Stalag 17 (1953) - Copycat (1995) - The Score (2001) - The Last King of Scotland (2006) - Annie Hall (1977) - The Wild Geese (1978) - Ghost World (2001) - Criminal Law (1989) - Deliverance (1972) - Picnic at Hanging Rock (1975) - Demon Seed (1977) - Chinatown (1975) - Get Out (2017) - The Atomic Kid (1954) - Logan's Run ((1976) - Apocalypse Now (1979) - The Day the Earth Stood Still (2009 version) - Saturn 3 (1980) - The Star Chamber (1983) - King Kong ((1976 version) - Seal Team Six (2013) - Glengarry GlenRoss (1992) - Valkyrie (2009) - Girl with the Dragon Tattoo (2011) - Breaker Morant (1980) - The Bounty (1984) - The China Syndrome (1979) - The Final Countdown (1980) - Gallipoli (1981) - The Blue Lagoon (1980) - The Thing (1982) - Escape from New York (1981) - Misery (1990) - The Shining (1980) - The Mechanic (1974 version) - Magnum Force (1974) - Heat (1995) - Spartacus (1960) - The Boys from Brazil (1976) - Evil Under The Sun (1981) - Death on the Nile (1978) - Disclosure (1994) - Falling Down (1993) - The Rocky Horror Picture Show (1975) - Blood Diamond (2006) - Little Voice (1998) - The Big Boss (1971) - Von Ryan's Express (1965) - Harry Brown (2009) - The Game (1997) - Chinatown (1974) - Klute (1971) - Clambake (1967) - Devil Girl From Mars (1954) - The Gift (2015) - Lake Mungo (2008) - Harry in your Pocket (1973) - Mad Max 2 (1981) - Fargo (1996) - Single White Female (1992) - Run Lola Run (1998) - Urban Cowboy (1980) - You Only Live Twice (1967) - The Gaunlet (1977) - The Theory of Everything (2014) - The Hand that Rocks the Cradle (1992) - Rear Window (1954) - Burke and Wills (1985) - The Nutty Professor (1963 version) - Planet of the Apes (1968 version) - From Russia with Love (1963) - Frenzy (1972) - Blowout (1981) - Rocky (1976) - The World of Suzie Wong (1960) - Breezy (1973) - The Omen (1976 version) - Joker (2019) - The Terminator (1984) - Aliens (1986) - First Blood (1982) The Shadow List - From Russia with Love (1963) - The Great Escape (1963) - Speed (1994) - Mommie Dearest (1981) - Primal Fear (1996) - The Coolangatta Gold (1984) - The Aviator (2004) - The Omega Man (1971) - Groundhog Day (1993) - Seven (1995) - Platoon (1986) - The Money Train (1995) - Close Encounters of the Third Kind (1977) - One Flew Over the Cukoos Nest (1975) - Hang 'Em High (1968) - The Final Countdown (1980) - Goldfinger (1964) - Way of the Dragon (1972) - Taxi Driver (1976) - Carrie (1976) - The Exorcist (1973) - Jaws (1975) - Natural Born Killers (1994) - The Jackal (1997) - Just Cause (1995) - Blade (1998) - Fight Club (1999) - Eye in the Sky (2016) - Working Class Man (1986) - Silence of the Lambs (1991) - Ferris Bueller's Day Off (1986) - The Stepford Wives (1975 version) - Some Kind of Wonderful (1987) - The Man Who Knew Infinity (2016) -The Bunker (1981) - Lucy (2014) - Rocky 2 (1979) - Flatliners (1990) - Young Frankenstein (1974) - A Kiss Before Dying (1991) - Goldfinger (1964) - Hidden Figures (2017) - Wolf Creek (2005) View all posts by Glen Available

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