So there’s another problem with the draft.
Maaaybe less of a problem and more of a quandary, if the difference is anything more than semantic.
It’s a problem with language. A quandary of character.
See, I created this antagonist to be a real bastard. And to be fair, I think I’ve been successful. He’s a total jerkface. A real knee-biter. Virtually unlikable to everybody in the book except for one, and that one only tolerates him out of some twisted past business relationship… the details don’t matter. He’s a doodie head.
And I absolutely, 100% believe that each character an author creates is, in some small way or another, an aspect of the author himself (or herself). I just don’t think there’s any getting around that — pour your heart and soul into the work and, well, you end up with a work that’s full of your heart and your soul, perhaps more literally than you planned. And this guy is probably me on a morning when the alarm failed to go off and the car door handle broke and the traffic is outrageous and I forgot my badge for work and then I get to work and it turns out to be Saturday. He’s a grouch and a grump and he snaps at the word go and a big part of what makes him so nasty is that he’s as foul-mouthed as a dog that’s been flossing with roadkill.
And there’s the problem.
No, that’s not the problem. The language works for the character. It fits him like a tailored suit. The problem is, I don’t know if the language fits the book. And that brings me back to audience.
I think I’ve mentioned this before, but I’m not sure I know who my audience is for this damn thing. I mean, I do. It’s people more or less like me, maybe a bit younger. And as a reader, language doesn’t bother me. A good profanity-laden rant is good for the soul, and let’s be honest, as much as it amuses me to toss around the sharknados and fargos on the blarg here, they’re no substitute for the real thing when real emotion is on the line. But I’m probably not most readers. Maybe it’s a bit cart-before-the-horse, but I’m really worried that the profanity, appropriate as it is for the character, and fun as it is for me to write (and read), is going to alienate potential readers.
So there’s the quandary. There’s nothing wrong with the character as far as the narrative is concerned (at least, as far as I can tell at this point in the edit), and yet I feel like his harshness might be wrong for the story. Which, then, is more important — an authentic character or a more widely-appealing story? Do I scale back his jerk-facery in favor of making him a little bit less off-putting? Do I think up alternate ways to make the character unlikable? Plant some puppies in his path for him to stomp on, send him to bars to abuse the waitstaff, have him drive really slow in the fast lane? Or do I leave him just the way he is , potential offended readers be damned?
Nothing to do for the moment, I suppose, but throw it on the pile for Further Future Me to sort through and decide on later.