Tag Archives: target

Horsepack (A Target Adventure)


Wife: What’s a horsepack?

Husband: What?

Wife: Horsepack. Look at this. What’s a horsepack?

The husband has played this game before. She’s trying to get him to say something ridiculous. “Horsepack? Like the horse packs its suitcase? For vacation?” Nope, he’s not falling for it. He looks.

Husband: …Hopsack?

Wife: Huh?

Husband: It says “hopsack.”

(Pause.)

Wife: What the hell is a hopsack?

Moral of the story: either Target needs to adjust its nomenclature (seriously, if it wasn’t for the picture on the box, I would have no idea what a hopsack was, either) or my wife needs to renew her prescription.

Er, I mean, the hypothetical wife. Who bears resemblance to a real wife only by coincidence.


Clearance Rack


Is there anything more fun about Target than trying on the accessories?

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Here’s a photo in desperate need of a caption. Or maybe it’s a story prompt.

Try it. YOU KNOW YOU WANT TO.


Do You Wanna Go To Target? (A Frozen Tribute)


If you love Frozen, like my wife and I do — and you love Target, like my wife and I do — then this is for you.

Inspired by randomly changing the lyrics to every song our kids like — because how else can you make it through listening to them 100+ times over the course of a few weeks?

To the tune of Do You Wanna Build a Snowman.

Do You Wanna Go To Target?

Do you wanna go to Target?

Come on, I just got paid

You never take me anymore

but I get off at four: Today could be the day!

Their clothes are all on clearance

and their movies, too

It’s all fifty percent off!

Do you wanna go to Target?

Come on, we’ll put it on the red card.

I just paid it off.

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I’m so happy we’re at Target

did you see the dollar aisle?

I’ll get an Icee and a popcorn too

And I’ll get some for you, cause we’ll be here a while

I’ve gotta get some dish soap, and some undies too

Then stop by the pharmacy

Hey, go find a price on gym socks

I’m gonna go and find a bike lock

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Shopping interlude

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Honey, hey, I’m at the checkout

and I’m just wondering where you are

I saw you checking out that camping gear, but

I kinda need you here: my wallet’s in the car

I’ve spent a hundred dollars, but that’s just my stuff

We still have to ring up yours

I think we emptied out the checking

but I’m so glad we went to Target

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Yeah, I maybe spent waaaay too much time on this.


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