The great thing about having taken about nine months in between drafting this novel and now running through it for the first edit is that I really get to read it with fresh eyes. I’ve totally forgotten some of the gems and turns of phrase that I used the first time around.
My favorite from today’s session?
In the late afternoon sun, the towering house loomed dark and silent, its shadow spilling down the hill and toward their feet like the runoff from a broken sewer line.
I mean, come on. I’d read that.
Other notables, maybe not so awesome or thematically coherent:
Trees “…thick and gnarled and knotty as the hands of a retired coal miner.”
something “…as stealthy as a camel in clown shoes.”
“perfume that reminded you of your next door neighbor, who somehow smelled like the fifties must have smelled, all cigarettes and sock hops.”
I mean, I don’t know if any of those are going to survive the edit. But they’re sure fun to rediscover.